So Much More

Remember this rant? About how I’m floored at how average humans afford to live, even when they are working full-time jobs that make above minimum wage (with the reality that most of them can’t afford to live, aside from being paycheck-to-paycheck, finding another job or splitting incomes with a partner or friend)?

That hopelessness and the overwhelming, “What the freak am I supposed to do?” feeling has only increased in the past week.

First off, though, there was a surprise: I actually got a raise. (I know, I’m just as shocked as you are.) Though the budget library wide made that impossible to happen, which is why I was so convinced that wasn’t an option, the university pulled through and gave eligible employees a raise! Sure, it’s only .45 cents for this kid, but this kid isn’t complaining at all. She’ll take it.

And then, within a span of 24 hours, I learned of two additional things. First was that Kansas state taxes are increasing not only this month, but in January of 2018, as well. So not only are they taking more out of my paycheck each month, but the amount I owe the government come April will most likely increase. Worse, the bracket of incomes that are projected to be effected the most are “single households fresh out of college making $30,000 a year.” Sound familiar? So that’s going to be fun.

Then, secondly, my retirement options email came through today and I have a month to figure that shit out. Talk about adulting slapping you in the face and making sure you’re well aware that you’re no kid anymore. I’m just overwhelmed trying to begin to discern which provider to choose, let alone all the nuances that go with retirement I’m not even sure about. I wish I would have learned a bit more when I was younger about how to navigate these waters. Granted, I knew retirement would be taken out come September and even if it wasn’t mandatory by my employer (which it is) I still would have opted into it, because I recognize how important it is to start saving as early as you can. That said, that doesn’t make the process any less daunting, nor the pay-cut any less painful for me now, even if I’m looking out for little old lady me in the future.

So yeah, I’m just a tad bit stressed financially. What else is new?

It’s taken up a lot of my thoughts, recently. So much so that I keep forgetting what really matters.

There is so much more to life than money.

Granted, that is easy to say and a lot harder to believe, let alone live by. Because money dictates a lot of things. Bills have to be paid and in order to make money, you gotta work, which makes up for a lot of the time you spend in your life. Yet you can’t let it be everything, even if it is a major part of your life. Recently, that’s all I’ve really been able to think about.

Yet I’ve been reading some really good books lately. I actually made it to the first (free!) Mythgard class over The Treason of Isengard last night and nerded out over Tolkien with individuals all across the globe, and that was invigorating in and of itself. I think I’ve finally found a running routine that I enjoy and is both feasible and productive. It’s the summer time, so even though it’s hot as everything else, swimming has been amazing. I’ve been editing my favorite story and love the progress of this draft. PitchWars starts in a few weeks and I’m really stoked to enter into that contest and continue to learn from and get to know such a supportive community. I’ve started a D&D campaign with some friends and learning the ropes alongside them has been wonderful. I have a couple of coffee dates in the future that I’m super jazzed about. I’m doing well at work and excited for the new semester to start. I’m getting new ink the first week of August and cannot wait to see what my new artist has come up with. Plus, only 36 days until I’m on a plane and heading to freakin’ London.

Yeah, life is stressful, right now. Money is stressful and I feel like I can never get caught up, that I’m always behind paying this bill or trying to get away from this debt. But at the same time, there are a lot of good things going on in life and a lot of good things ahead. Just like there are a lot of trying times and a lot of difficult things ahead.

You can’t just focus on all the negative things. You’ll drive yourself into a depressed spiral that’s really hard to get out of, if you do that. You gotta remember to focus on the good, including the little things (like hearing your favorite song on the radio, getting to hit snooze on the weekend or crossing something off of your To-Do list) to the rare things (like seeing a friend from out of town or spending an entire day doing nothing) to the grand, exciting things (like traveling abroad or achieving your dreams). That’s what I’m trying to do: focus on the good and remembering that I can handle the bad, no matter what’s thrown at me.

And so can you.

Cheers.

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About Nicole Evans

Nicole Evans is a writer of fantasy and science fiction. She is currently unpublished and is working fervently to get the "un" removed from that statement. She's written a trilogy about destined heroes that fail anyway, has started a science fiction trilogy that pits the natural desire to love against the natural instinct to kill during the extinction of the human race and the start of a series with the sole goal of fitting in as many tropes as possible into nine books.  She really can't wait for you to read these stories.  Considering she has run out of space for putting rejections letters up on her wall, Nicole now uses her spare time doing the typical things that nerds do: blogging, dying repeatedly during video games (which she believes is retribution for the characters' she's killed), wishing she was the character she is currently reading about and trying to fight off the real world by living in her own head, with varying degrees of success. Nicole has a degree in Creative Writing and a minor in Film and Media Studies, and works as an evening librarian assistant. View all posts by Nicole Evans

7 responses to “So Much More

  • philcharlesr

    An insightful post as always. It really sucks that our generation has the financial short straw, both in the U.S and the UK, but it’s great you’ve got some good things to look forward to 🙂.

  • Joyce C

    “Because money dictates a lot of things. Bills have to be paid and in order to make money, you gotta work, which makes up for a lot of the time you spend in your life. Yet you can’t let it be everything, even if it is a major part of your life. Recently, that’s all I’ve really been able to think about.”

    ^ This is the major struggle of adult life: what we want to do and what we need to do. Eventually, something’s got to give :/

    “You can’t just focus on all the negative things. You’ll drive yourself into a depressed spiral that’s really hard to get out of, if you do that. You gotta remember to focus on the good, including the little things”
    This is especially pertinent today. (RIP, Chester Bennington.)

  • Chester Bennington was depressed | the writes of passage

    […] as my friend Nicole (and fellow Muse) said in this post, “There are a lot of good things going on in life and a lot of good things ahead. Just like […]

  • Marie E. Stump

    I am officially down to ONE part-time job in two weeks, and oh my goodness, I needed to read this right now. Thanks, love!
    As daunting as it all is, you’ll figure it out! You’re a smart cookie and more discerning than most (especially most at our stage of life), so I have complete faith that you’ve got a better handle on things than you think. 🙂 Just keep swimming!

    • Nicole Evans

      Yay for getting down from three to one! That’s impressive, friend. I’m so glad you connected with this post! 😀 Thank you for your encouragement, Marie. It’s always appreciated and needed.

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